Diary of a Wimpy Adult: Jan. 4th, 2017


Word of the week: Revenge Porn

The morning news introduced a new word: revenge porn– it almost sounds as sinister and painful as anal bleaching or maybe it’s a new Cold War tactic of Putin and his gang, but no, it’s none of the above.

Revenge porn happens when your ex, that slightly abusive ex who always insisted on filming the two of you in the act, (I mean, who the fuck does that, but then I’m not a navel gazing millenial… in fact, I find selfies the worst side effect of cell phone technology), posts that porn online after you break up with him.

A woman is suing not only to have the video taken offline but she also wants all the major search engines to delete her name so she becomes unsearchable. The latter is ridiculous of course as there may be others with the woman’s same name who would want to be searchable or simply don’t want to be erased from the digital archives of our time.

There’s two interesting things going on here:

  1. People’s perceived notion of privacy and wanting to protect privacy
  2. Internet Shaming

As for 1: Privacy doesn’t exist: if you go online and engage, in whatever limited way, your cover is blown and you can and will be found if people are seriously looking for you.

As for 2: If you thought public shaming was a thing of the Middle Ages, when culprits would be forced to stand in shackles on shaming pedestals in the town square, you’ve got that wrong too, because every time you call someone out on FB for being a bigot, a Nazi or a nincompoop, you’re essentially holding a megaphone and announcing it to the rest of the world. Working in tech on the support side of things, I’m amazed how many people are not aware of the megaphone effect of the internet and social media.

So revenge porn is part of that shaming culture, and I’m now pondering how I should break this to my kids, i.e. insist that they never get filmed while getting screwed, being baked or getting hammered because… one day, one crucial day when you have that job interview with that company you really want to work for, it may and could be used against you.

Scent of the Week: Rat Aroma

So… we live in Orinda, a bucolic community with lots of ivy, running creeks, country club greens, trophy wives, Teslas… and rats.

Our house is old and the soil in California moves with abandon so every house has holes and new holes. When the rains hit, rats come inside through holes that can be as small as an American quarter. We heard a rat in the basement, so Jon set 3 traps. They all went off… but no rat… or rather, the sucker probably got hit and found a nice and warm spot to die… in our walls or under our floor… You get the drift. I have my scented candles going at full force and I can still smell the fucker while Caroline complains about really fat and slow flies, buzzing in her bedroom. There goes the neighborhood…

There’s always, always, a silver lining though. I could have some revenge porn video of myself being shared on the internet right now in which case I would want to have been caught in a rat trap myself.

You think this is dark and depressing? It’s life and I try to live by Henry Miller’s mantra this year and that is that life is not a tragedy but a farce, so let’s keep on laughing! Cheers.

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